The Night Before Day 1

Well, technically it's not day 1. Day 1 begins when you learn of your child's allergy or receive a diagnosis. It has been a LONG journey to get us to this point. 

From red cheeks after a peanut butter laden wash cloth wiped her face to several blood tests, many homemade cupcakes, turning down invitations and countless hours of research later, here we are. Three plus hours away from home and ready to wake up tomorrow morning and intentionally give my daughter peanut. It is surreal. It is almost as if I am watching this from afar but not actually taking part. 

But as I lay here, with my darling daughter next to me, before we begin part 2 of this journey, I am humbled and calmed by all of the support, research and treatments that are now available to families like ours. I'm a fixer.  I don't succumb to the status quo.  I find solutions.  And I know this is the right thing. Even though there will be bumps. Even though we have to commit to this six hour drive twice a month. (We feel lucky that's all it is, actually. I have heard of many families moving from overseas to undergo this treatment.) 

Soon, my daughter will be safe. Safe and free to enjoy birthday cakes, ice cream from ice cream parlors, attend sleepovers, camps, and not be relegated to the "peanut table" when she begins kindergarten next year. I am giving my daughter her childhood. And while I will probably not get much sleep tonight, knowing that is all I need to remember tomorrow.